Did I crack the code? Probably not but honestly, when I started thinking about this, I felt like I had. As a psychotherapist and general guy who overthinks things and runs his mouth too much, I’ve spent years believing there’s a certain way to live and I’ve spent a lot of time telling people about it. Most of that audience are my paying clients and, by default, asked for my opinion but if you were one of the ones who aren’t and didn’t, my bad.
I’ve struggled, though, to find a concrete answer as to why I should live a certain way. I mean, what’s the point? If my existential/nihilistic leanings ultimately end with thought “none of this matters” then why even bother? If, in the end, we all die and it dies with us and we likely won’t even experience death anymore than we experienced the time before we’re born, then why not just shoot up heroin every day, spend endless hours with prostitutes and be completely gluttonous in every possible way. Why NOT choose hedonism and “enjoy” life, burn out quickly and leave a charred but very experienced corpse?
The easy and obvious, but nonetheless valuable, answer to this is because I’ll enjoy in a deeper way. Not just in the hedonistic way but in a qualitatively better and more fulfilling way. I choose not to drink to excess more than occasionally because life is generally better without cirrhosis of the liver. There are probably lots of criminal activities that are super fun but I choose not to be involved because life is usually better outside of the penitentiary. I hate exercising but I almost always feel better when I do it. I allow myself to feel my feelings because, although sometimes more difficult, it’s a more truthful, pure and honest way of living that almost always results in a net more satisfying existence.
For most of us those are sufficient answers. Do it because it feels good long term. Problem solved. But what about the deeper meaning? Is there a larger, dare I say, even spiritual meaning other than “cuz it feelz guud?” Is there a reason for me to live in a healthy, virtuous, meaning seeking manner that transcends humanity other than the antiquated notion that a man in the sky will give me cake when I die if I’m good? To me, the answer is obviously yes (otherwise why write a blog about it right?).
Despite a growing understanding of how the universe works and despite our searching of this universe for the contrary, we seem to be entirely alone. No green aliens, no Klingons, no Wookies, no bacteria or even one fossil of a single celled organism. Not even a fraction of a hint of evidence of anything that ever was or ever will be alive. Just us. Just humans, plants and animals and out of trillions of planets, only on earth. And of those living beings that reside on that one lucky planet, it’s likely that humans alone possess consciousness in the way we possess it. And of those living beings who posses consciousness in a form that enables us to contemplate existence, you and I, despite the vast problems with present society and government and culture, happen to be living in the most prosperous, well fed, well housed, abundant, tolerant, inclusive, safe, air conditioned, internet-ed, cushy point in the entire history of our species, period. Let us also not forget the billions of accidents and coincidences that got us to that point in the first place. By chance, Earth rests in the Goldilocks Zone of our solar system; not too far from the sun, not too close; just right. Distantly related to this through a series of mostly blind and random mutations, it was our species alone that evolved in such way that we achieved consciousness and became the dominant species. Out of the trillions of sperm produced by every man on the planet, there was only one that made you you and the fact that you survived long enough after conception to be the somewhat hairless primate your are now who’s taking the time to read a stupid blog is nothing short of odds defying-ly astounding. Put all those points together and ask yourself the question; HOW UNBELIEVABLY LUCKY ARE YOU? Statistically speaking, you shouldn’t be here but despite all those odds, you are. Doesn’t that mean something? MIGHT that make you something special? Doesn’t that specialness POSSIBLY give you some responsibility? MIGHT THAT mean some obligation to do this right? It’s said that the possibility of life is as likely as a million monkeys at a million typewriters accidentally writing the greatest novel ever written. If that were literally the case, wouldn’t that book be one of the most celebrated, cherished and awe inspiring artifacts ever created? And wouldn’t that book be treated respectfully and maybe even celebrated as sacred? Well, here we are; the greatest novel ever written and being read by you at possibly the best part of the story.
We are a completely isolated and lonely anomaly throughout all space and time and all signs point to that uniqueness coming by way of sheer chance. Again, statistically speaking, we’re not even supposed to be here. I believe that imbues me with a duty to live well. It obligates me to approach my life with an attitude of humility, respect and gratitude and awe and to live it as fully as I can in and in the healthiest, most life affirming way possible. Human existence is the result of random coincidences spread out of time. We’re accidentally special and that accidental nature is part of what makes us special. You have been given a gift and that gift is a one in a bazaillion shot. It is your job to treat it as such.
Unrelated Album:
Let’s get nostalgic for a second. This was one of the first actual CD’s I ever owned. Not my favorite band in the world but still really good. Saw them on a recent tour stop and I can tell ya, they still goT it!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pHlKg9qswlk
Unrelated Book Recommendation:
Martin Heidegger – Being and Time. Yup. Still reading it. Still not getting it. Still recommending it.
Brandon Peters, LPC 